Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Knick Knacks of Porcelain

Now last nights dream is confusing me since it was apparently about someone I have never met. Maybe i will in the future?


Matt and I were at home in the kitchen and the doorbell rang. There was a girl outside that was coming to get payment for a subway sub Matt had purchased for lunch and didn't have the case to pay for.Matt was telling me she was a good girl and was good at making corn dogs on string. We were considering having her as a babysitter because she would be a good role model for Briana.  He answered the door and paid her. She had auburn hair that was REALLY curly and brown eyes, there were 2 other people behind her that i didn't really see as well. Then suddenly she was gone and we were in her home/bedroom but it seemed like we were still in our house or that we never really left. We were looking at all the knick knacks she had all over her room and most were to memorialize those she knew that had passed. Out of them we seen she had lost 2 brothers, an aunt, and many others. Each had their own little knick knack, the brothers had porcelain blue hands and the aunt has a porcelain flower vase deal. Most of the items were of porcelain though. I had also noticed she had some awards commemorating her corn dog making skills, lol! There were a few items that reminded me of knick knacks i had as a child as well.  Later in the dream i remember camping with Matt and the kids, we were down by a lake swimming and the kids were jumping off of a pier. I had left do do something else but cant really remember.
Kitchen
To see a kitchen in your dream, signifies your need for warmth, spiritual nourishment and healing. It may also be symbolic of the nurturing mother or the way that you are for your loved ones. Alternatively the kitchen, represents a transformation. Or perhaps the dream could be telling you that if "you can't stand the heat, then you need to get out of the kitchen". You need to abort your plans.

Doorbell
To dream that you hear or ring a door bell, indicates that you are open to new experiences.

Door
To dream that you are entering through a door, signifies new opportunities that are presented before you. You are entering into a new stage in your life and moving from one level of consciousness to another.�In particular, a door that opens to the outside, signifies your need to be more accessible to others, whereas a door that opens into the inside, denotes your desire for inner exploration and self-discovery.

To see an opened door in your dream, symbolizes your receptiveness and willingness to accept new ideas/concepts. In particular, to see a light behind the door, suggests that you are moving toward greater enlightenment/spirituality.
Paying
To dream that you are paying for something, indicates the price you pay for your decisions and actions.

Girls
To see a girl in your dream, represents your playful, innocent, and childlike nature. Perhaps you are behaving immaturely in some situation. Alternatively, a girl represents the feminine qualities of your character.

Bedroom
To dream that you are in the bedroom, signifies aspects of yourself that you keep private. It is also indicative of your sexual nature and intimate relations.

Porcelain
To see or touch porcelain in your dream, symbolizes smoothness. Things are going well for you. Alternatively, the dream may also represent some delicate situation. You need to treat it with care.

Camping
To dream that you are camping, indicates a need for relaxation and a long-deserved break.You need to be more in touch with nature and go back to a more basic and simpler life. Alternatively, it refers to your social circle and support group. You are looking for a sense of belonging, but at the same time be self-sufficient and independent.

 Swimming
To dream that you are swimming, suggests that you are exploring aspects of your unconscious mind and emotions. The dream may be a sign that you are seeking some sort of emotional support. It is a common dream image for people going through therapy.


Ok, now 1/2 way through this interpretation i was thinking this is about my counseling....and the very last representation put it pretty clearly!
The girl in the dream in believe was representing my inner child, which we are opening the door through therapy to greet. The payment Matt is giving is what he will have to do to actually have from her (me) what he already "ate". Its time for him to "pay". In my dream he was very reluctant to open up the door and pay her, yet he was telling me how nice she was and all that. Eventually he did open up and payed her what he owed for his subway lunch. We were then exploring her bedroom and all of her knick knacks, she held onto all those she memorialized and they were and are all very fragile to her. I believe these are all representing my feelings and things that have happened in my past that we will be digging into  through counseling. I was shocked in the dream seeing them all laid out on the shelves and on the walls, just how much this girl had been through. Well, the same holds true for me. I just never laid it all out before me before. The camping is representing the MUCH NEEDED relaxing time away we need. My brothers wedding is coming up and i cant wait to go relax with all of my family. The swimming represented what i was assuming all along, this dream represents my therapy.
It is just SO interesting how i can wake from a dream pretty darned confused and interpret into something that makes complete sense!

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Meteor Shower


I again woke in the middle of the night, at about 3 am with those all too familiar pangs of anxiety after i dreamt of a meteor shower raining down upon my home.
My husband, son, a friend of his and i were in the living room of our home and I was looking out the window. It was night and from the sky i seen a slew of meteors slowly headed towards the house. I watched as one came barreling through the wall and nearly took out my son. I grabbed my children and took them into the back room of the basement. I came back upstairs and my husband was using the fire extinguisher to blow out any fire from the meteor. I looked out the window and seen a TON of them all over the yard. There were trees knocked down in the yard and across the river and smoke from some that had burned what it hit.

Husband
To see your husband in your dream, signifies the waking relationship with your husband and the unconscious feelings you have towards him. The dream may be trying to focus on hidden elements that you are not addressing in your waking life.

Son
To see your son in your dream, signifies your ideal, hopes, potential, and the youthful part of yourself. On the other hand, to see your son in your dream may not have any significance and is simply mirroring your waking life. The dream may also be a pun on "sun".

Friend
To see friends in your dream, signify aspects of your personality that you have rejected, but are ready to incorporate and acknowledge. The relationships you have with those around you are important in learning about yourself. Alternatively, dreaming of a friend, indicates positive news.

Living Room
To dream that you are in the living room, represents the image that you portray to others and the way which you go about your life. It is representative of your basic beliefs about yourself and who you are. Alternatively, the living room is indicative of your freedom and space. The living room is a symbolic boundary between your personal self and your public self. Objects that do not belong in the living room denote the various aspects of your life that are invading your personal space.

Window
To dream that you are looking out the window, signifies your outlook on life, your consciousness and your point of view. It also refers to your intuition and awareness. You may be reflecting on a decision. Or you need to go out into the larger world and experience life. If you are looking in the window, then it indicates that you are doing some soul searching and looking within yourself. It is time for some introspection. To see another face in the window in your dream, suggests that you are feeling emotionally distant and physically detached. Also consider the emotion depicted on the face.
Night
To have a dream that takes place at night, represents some major setbacks and obstacles in achieving your goals. You are being faced with an issue that is not so clear cut. Perhaps, you should put the issues aside so you can clear your head and come back to it later. Alternatively, night may be synonymous with death, rebirth, reflection, and new beginnings.

Sky
To dream that the sky is falling, represents your fear of the unknown. You feel that your hopes and dreams have been shattered. Perhaps you have been too idealistic and the dream is an attempt to bring you back to reality.
To dream that something is falling out of the sky, signifies your pessimistic attitude. You are losing perspective on a situation. If the object is getting closer and casting a shadow on you, then it indicates that you are being ignorant about some situation. You need to get out from under the shadow and gain a different perspective on things.
Meteor
To see a meteor in your dream, suggests that you will experience success in a project. You are on your way toward realizing your goals and desires. Alternatively, the meteor refers to wishful thinking and idealistic thoughts.

To see a meteor shower in your dream, signifies romantic thoughts and idealistic notions.
Slow Motion
To dream that you are moving in slow motion, suggests that you are feeling powerless, anxious or frustrated. You are currently going through a hard time in your waking life and experiencing tremendous stress, which is almost immobilizing you.

Basement
To dream that you are in a basement, symbolizes your unconscious mind and intuition. The appearance of the basement is an indication of your unconscious state of mind and level of satisfaction.  It represents primal urges, animalistic desires and basic needs. The dream may also be metaphor for "abasement" or being "debased". Are you feeling humbled or unworthy?

To dream that the basement is in disarray and messy, signifies some confusion in which you need to sort out. These are things that you have "stored" away or put aside in your mind because you do not know what to do with it or you do not have the time to deal with it. It may also represent your perceived faults and shortcomings.
Fire Extinguisher
To see or use a fire extinguisher in your dream, suggests that you are trying to get your emotions under control. Alternatively, the dream means that you need to let go of whatever anger you are still holding on to.

Backyard
To dream about your backyard, represents your childhood memories or your unconscious. Alternatively, dreaming of your backyard, refers to the secrets you are keeping. There are some aspects of your life which you want to keep hidden and out of the view of others. The dream also represents some aspect of your life that you have taken for granted. Consider also the phrase "not in my backyard." In other words, everything is okay as long as it does not happen to you or occur in your own home. The condition of the yard is also symbolic of how well you maintain and balance aspects of your life.

Trees
To see a falling tree in your dream, means that you are feeling off balance and out of sync. Perhaps, you are off track and headed in the wrong direction.
Smoke
To see smoke in your dream, indicates some sort of trouble that is entering your life. You are suffering from confusion and anxiety. In particular, if the smoke is black, then it means that you are not seeing some situation or problem clearly.


I am honestly not sure where to go with this dream. I have has A LOT of dreams that i was in the basement at some point durring the dream. This one i was finding refuge in the basement from the falling meteors. In which this case the meteors were falling slowly towards the house and have a positive representation....
Maybe what i have for hopes and dreams are coming on slowly? I have to be patient and get everything else in my life in balance and secure before i can move on to these dreams and idealistic hopes?
The beginning of the dream with my family and i in the living room i feel represent my husband and my relationship. His friend is representing the relationship i would like to have with my husband. My son, representing my hopes. I was then looking out the window and noticed the meteors showering down upon the house. I ten took refuge in the basement. I often do take refuge in my own thoughts and conscious, especially when i blog. When i came back upstairs my husband was using the extinguisher, is there anger i have to let go of between my husband and i? I again looked out the window into the back yard and it was destroyed with meteors and fallen trees. Which is where i feel i am. My backyard is destroyed, i feel like my life was demolished when Stella died, and in many way it surely was and still is in pretty bleak shape. To end the dream with seeing the smoke from the trees and meteors doesnt look to good and that sucks. i sure hope there is NO MORE trouble entering into my life at this time. I cant handle anymore crap.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Pregnancy


Last night I had the infamous pregnancy dream. Many women have dreams of being pregnant, mostly because that is what we do, what we've been though or what we are hoping for. I in hand have been hoping to no avail.

My dream i remember was taking place in an old mansion looking home. My Dr and i were in the study and she was telling me she thought i was pregnant with triplets and was giving me an ultrasound. We took one of the babys out, a boy, so we could get a better look at the others in there. He was that of a toddler and started walking out of the room. I told him he needed to get back in me and went and got him. I told the Dr. that i wasn't sure that i was pregnant with triplets, but maybe twins and she told me i looked huge. I looked in the mirror at my belly and it was HUGE, but the right size to be about 5-6 months pregnant with triplets ( wide and about the size of a 10 month pregnant me) I studied myself in the mirror for a bit and woke up.
Mansion
To see a mansion in your dream, symbolizes your greatest potential and growth. You may feel that your current situation or relationship is in a rut.

Doctor
To dream that you are seeing the doctor, indicates your need for emotional and spiritual healing. The dream could also highlight medical concerns. Perhaps it is time to go and get a physical check up.

Library/Study
To dream that you are in a library, signifies your search for knowledge and your hunger for ideas. You may be trying to seek out new meanings to life. You need to study and evaluate your situation before taking action. If the library is disorganized, then it suggests that too much information is coming at you at the same time. You are having difficulty sorting it all out.

To see a library in your dream, symbolizes the knowledge you have accumulated over the years.
Pregnant
To dream that you are pregnant, symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. Being pregnant in your dream may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal. Alternatively, if you are trying to get pregnant, then the dream may be a wish fulfillment. If you are not trying to get pregnant, but dream that you are, then it symbolizes fear of new responsibilities.

Triplets
To see triplets in your dream, suggest that you need to consider the physical, the emotional and the spiritual aspects of a situation or decision. Also think about the significance of things that may appear in threes in your waking life.

Twins
To see twins in your dream, signify ambivalence, dualities or opposites. It also represents security in business, faithfulness, and contentment with life. It may also mean that you are either in harmony with or in conflict between ideas and decisions.

Ultrasound
To dream that you are getting an ultrasound, signifies a new and developing phase in your life. Perhaps you are starting a new relationship, switching jobs or relocating. The dream may also reflect your actual concerns about a pregnancy or your desires to have children.

Baby
To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you find a baby in your dream, then it suggests that you have acknowledged your hidden potential. If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses. Alternatively, forgetting about a baby, represents an aspect of yourself that you have abandoned or put aside due to life's changing circumstances. The dream may serve as a reminder that it is time for you to pick up that old interest, hobby, or project again. If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it signifies your issues of dependency and your desires to be completely care for.

Mirror
To dream of your own reflection in the mirror, suggests that you are pondering thoughts about your inner self. The reflection in the mirror is how you perceive yourself or how you want others to see you. You may be contemplating on strengthening and changing aspects of your character.


This dream is clearly stating my want and desire to be pregnant again. It also shows, with the study, that i have gained more knowledge on the fact of pregnancy and having a child. The mansion is representing the fact that my husband is not in the "TTC" boat with me and doesn't share the desire in having more children right now. The Dr. is representing the healing spiritually and emotionally i have to do before we do get pregnant again, which i am on the road to doing as of now. The twins and triplets i feel are representing the 3 emotional factors going into the equation of me wanting to have another child and the twins the duality of Matt and i disagreeing on this factor as of now. The ultrasound is just as it states, the new and developing stage in my life right now. The baby in my dream i feel is representing the vulnerability of the phase Matt and i are in right now with seeing a counselor to get everything ironed out between us. The mirror i feel is representing the image i want Mart to see me as, i want him to see the future that i do for us, which includes us adding to our family.


I later had some dream about watching a ton of children at some persons home. It was total chaos and i remember seeing my cousin. We were counting videotape cases and stacking up paper bags filled with vintage wine bottles. Very odd. Not sure if i am going to be interpreting this one.....

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

The Raging River

I had a few short dreams last night. Only 2 i can really remember bits and pieces of though. One part in particular sticks out far greater than any of the others, the Raging River.



I remember looking at a map and having to travel through Canada and some how end up in Japan. (I know it makes no sense at all). I remember looking at a river system as well. My brother Kevin was also in the dream somehow, on the phone with me i think, telling me Anthony Bordain wanted to meet him after he went travelling with the Grateful Dead. Anyways.... I was suddenly on the river in a canyon, i am not sure if i was walking or drifting down, but the water was rapid and i was not having an issue traveling down it. We came to a fork in the river and i remembered looking at the map and knowing i had to take the rougher course to the left. There was a guy with me and he had a raft,  i looked be hind me and told him "this was some professional white water rafting shit!"  I was hoping down the hills in the river over huge rocks and boulders with ease. We were coming to the end of it and there was a water slide looking hill, i asked to use the raft, which was more like a deflated inner tube. We flew down the hill and were in a hotel. We both went into the hallway and there were some people there. It was dark outside and apparently we were in Japan. The guy grabbed a cellphone off of a table that was ringing. I asked him what time it was because it was dark and he was trying to take the phone apart. He asked a women in the hall something in Japanese and told me there was "no interface in the phone." I woke up after that.

Map
To see or study a map in your dream, suggests that your current life path will lead to fulfillment of your needs and realization of your goals. It also indicates that you are set on the path to self knowledge and self discovery. If you have difficulties understanding or reading the map, then it means that you are feeling lost. You are literally still trying to find yourself and figure out where you want to go in life.


I was easily reading the map in the dream, so i feel it is representing how i am trying to map out how to deal with my emotions and "situation" in life as i now know it. I can only hope the path is leading to fulfilment.

River
To see a clear and calm river in your dream, indicates that you are just going with the flow. You are allowing your life to float away. It is time to take a more decisive role in directing your life. Alternatively, a river symbolizes joyful pleasures, peace, prosperity and fertility. If you are crossing a river in your dream, then it represents an obstacle or issue that you need to deal with in order to move closer toward your goal. It is also reflective of a new stage in your life. If the river is muddy, then it indicates that you are in turmoil.

To see a raging river in your dream, signifies that your life is feeling out of control. You are feeling emotionally unsettled. Alternatively, a river means you are ready to confront life's challenges and life's twists and turns.

The river was raging in my dream and i believe is representing my emotional state, which is obvously crazy. The fact that i can handle it easily in the dream i feel is representing how i am handling it in real life. I am just kind of going along with it, i can clearly see how hard it is but i am somehow handling it with ease.

Canyon
To see a canyon in your dream, represents your unconscious mind and hidden feelings. It may point to emotions and relationships that you did not recognize.


Fork In The Road (Or Fork in the River)
To see a fork in the road in your dream, represents an important decision that you need to make. It may indicate your choices or ambivalence about some situation. Alternatively, a fork symbolizes the union of opposites. Opposing views/aspects are coming together.


I am hoping the fork in this river is representing the fact that my husband and i are coming together in our opposite ways of thinking and feeling.

Left
To dream of the direction left, symbolizes the unconscious and your repressed thoughts/emotions. It is an indication of passivity.


I know for a fact i have been acting quite passively lately. I feel like i am just letting things go as they are. According to the map, it was the right way, so maybe it is what i have to do. Just go with it. What is the point of fighting?

Water Slide
To dream that you are on or see a water slide, suggests that you are being carried away by your emotions. You are being engulfed by your unconscious. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you are going with the flow of things without any objection or resistance.


 Inner Tube
To see an inner tube in your dream, represents the Self. You are not feeling emotionally whole.
To dream that you are inner tubing, suggests that you are on experiencing emotional ups and downs.

That's the truth!

Hotel
To see a hotel in your dream, signifies a new state of mind or a shift in personal identity. You are undergoing some sort of transition and need to move away from your old habits and old way of thinking. You need to temporarily escape from your daily life. Alternatively, the dream may imply a loss in your personal identity.


After the loss of Stella, that was the biggest blow to my personal identity and beliefs i have ever endured,  i am obvously still recovering.

Cell Phone
To see or use a cell phone in your dream, indicates that you are being receptive to new information. It also represents your mobility. Alternatively, the dream signifies lack of understanding. Perhaps you are having difficulties getting through to someone.

To dream that you lost your cell phone, represents a lack of communication. You have lost touch with some aspect of your feelings or your Self. If you find a cell phone, then it symbolizes reconnection and reopened communication.

The phone was ringing when we first found it, then suddenly it wasn't working and did not "have in interface" whatever that means..... I feel this may be pointing to a problem with communication.

Japan
To dream about Japan or that you are in Japan, depends on your own personal associations with the country. If you have never been to Japan, then the dream may represent some sort of realization enlightenment. As the land of the rising sun, Japan symbolizes peace of mind and tranquility.


Night
To have a dream that takes place at night, represents some major setbacks and obstacles in achieving your goals. You are being faced with an issue that is not so clear cut. Perhaps, you should put the issues aside so you can clear your head and come back to it later. Alternatively, night may be synonymous with death, rebirth, reflection, and new beginnings.


We ended in Japan after riding down the raging river and when we arrived in Japan in the hotel it was night. I am hoping it, together, will be representing new beginnings after a hard emotional ride.

The Garbage Can:



The next dream i had was in my grandparents yard. There was a bear and 2 other animals eating the garbage ( i am not positive but i believe they were a raccoon and a crow). I told them to pick up after they were done. I remember pointing to an apple on the ground and telling the bear to pick it up.

Grandparents
To see your grandparents in your dream, symbolize love, security, wisdom and protection.


Yard
To see a neat and well-kept yard, reflects your ability to maintain and organize aspects of your outside life, such as work and your social activities.

To see a messy and un-kept yard, denotes that aspects of your life are out of your control.

Bear
To see a bear in your dream, symbolizes independence, the cycle of life, death and renewal, and resurrection. You are undergoing a period of introspection and thinking. The dream may also be a pun on "bare". Perhaps you need to bare your soul and let everything out into the open.


Raccoon
To see a raccoon in your dream, signifies deceit and thievery. You are not being completely honest in some situation. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are hiding something. You are keeping a secret.


Crow
To see a crow in your dream, represents death and the darker aspects of your character. The dream could also be pointing out your annoying habits. Alternatively, the crow may be conveying a message from your unconscious.


Garbage Can
To see a garbage can in your dream, symbolizes unwanted ideas, thoughts or memories. It is time to rid yourself of the baggage. Alternatively, the garbage can means that you are rejecting an idea or emotion.

Garbage
To dream that you are throwing away garbage, suggests that you are kicking your old negative habits and throwing away your bad characteristics and unwanted traits. Alternatively, garbage indicates that you are not taking responsibility for something.

To see piles of garbage in your dream, represent rejected or unwanted aspects of yourself.
To find something valuable in the garbage, suggests that you can find value in the least expected of places. Do not undervalue or underestimate things. The dream may also be telling you that one man's trash is another man's treasure. Perhaps you need to view things from a different perspective.

Apples
To dream that you are eating an apple, denotes harmony, pleasure, and fertility. In a biblical sense, eating an apple symbolizes your sexual appetite, lustful desires, and sexual awareness as associated with the apple in the Garden of Eden.
To see apples scattered on the ground in your dream, signifies that false friends are working to deceive and harm you.
To see rotten or eaten apples in your dream, indicates that whatever you are striving and aiming for may not be fulfilling, and even harmful to you. It may also represent neglect and carelessness.
Much of the dream we were by the garbage can and i was talking with this bear and the other animals were near by. I feel this is pointing at my emotional baggage and how i should throw it out. The animals may be representing the aspects of myself i need to let go. The bear who i was speaking to is representing "baring myself" I am not sure about any kind of secrets that the raccoon may be representing, i am pretty darn honest (too honest really) and the crow could be representing the dark side of my emotions. The apple gets me. It was half eaten and on the ground. Maybe blogging my feelings on my other blog is harmful to me? I am unsure of this.


Telephone:



There was one last dream i had before waking and it had my mother in it. I dont remember too much but i do remember a few things in the dream. There were bikes in the dream, a phone and my mother giving me botox and some other beauty products to help me feel better because i was depressed about Stella.  I remember thinking i wouldn't use botox or the other product and i wish i had hair dye instead. There were other events that happened afterwards but i dont remember them.

Mother
To see your mother in your dream, represents the nurturing aspect of your own character. Mothers offer shelter, comfort, life, guidance and protection. Some people may have problems freeing themselves from their mothers and are thus seeking their own individuality and development.

To dream that you are having a conversation with your mother, denotes a matter that has preoccupied your mind and you are not sure how to deal with it in your waking life. It indicates unresolved problems that need to be worked out with your mother.
To hear your mother call you in our dream, suggests that you have been negligent in your duties and responsibilities. You are pursuing down the wrong path.

Bicycle
To dream that you are riding a bicycle, signifies your desires to attain a balance in your life. You need to balance work and pleasure in order to succeed in your current undertakings. If you have difficulties riding the bicycle, then it suggests that you are experiencing anxieties about making it on your own.

To see a bicycle in your dream, indicates that you need to devote time to leisurely pursuits and recreation.

Telephone
To see or hear a telephone in your dream, signifies a message from your unconscious or some sort of telepathic communication. You may be forced to confront issues which you have been avoiding. Alternatively, the telephone represents your communication and relationship with others. If there is no dial tone or the phone is left off the hook, then the dream indicates that you are shutting yourself out. You are experiencing difficulties in getting your thoughts and feelings across.


I feel this dream is pointing to communication with my mother. I feel she is always trying to help me but maybe not in the way i want or need. Which is represented in the beauty products. Communication represented by the phone. The bike is representing balance, and how i need to find that. That is my guess anyways.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Construction Zone

Last nights dreams were one of those dreams that leaves you weeping heavily though out the night. I am surprised i didn't wake in panic and fear like i usually do after having emotional dreams.



The dream was of a construction site where my husband was working. Some parts like a factory. But what had happened is that the place fell apart while there was a bring your kids to work day occurring. Many of the employees lost their children and Elijah was one of them. They didn't find his body in the rubble, only his sweater. Then it was about 3 years later and i was watching TV, on the screen was a newscast on how they found a child that was originally lost from the disaster at the construction zone. Immediately i knew it was Elijah. The authorities were doing some testing on another family that they had thought the child belonged to. I was balling my eyes out and crying out "I know that is Elijah, A mother knows her child"
The testing came back negative for the other family so i went into the company, which was now a factory. I was walking through a few different departments, such as an office and an engine room.  I remember talking to a woman about how I was going to see my son again after 3 years of him missing since the disaster. She told me she lost all 3 of her children in the same disaster. I remember thinking about what had happened to him. How he was washed away in a stream and found and raised in foster care for 3 years before the other family came forth stating that he was their lost son. I was in an office awaiting parental testing so that i could take my son home. The last thing i remember is hugging a much older and taller Elijah. But it was definitely him. I was overwhelmed with joy.

Construction
To see construction in your dream, signifies a new surge of energy, growth, ambition and renewed confidence. It may also represent the rebuilding of your own life.

To dream that a building is under construction, suggests that you need to work on some aspect of yourself and better your mind or body.
Factory
To dream that you are at a factory, represents repetitious thinking and an old way of doing things. It is symbolic of predictability and unchanging habits. Alternatively, it signifies business, productivity, energy and bustling activity. You are a person that can get things done.

Destruction
To dream about mass destruction, suggests that there is some chaos occurring in your life. Things may not be going the way you want it to. Perhaps the choices you are making are self-destructive.

Sweater
To see or wear a sweater in your dream, symbolizes warmth and love. You have a strong connection to your family and home life. Alternatively, a sweater represents innocence, immaturity, and/or naive thinking.

Son
To see your son in your dream, signifies your ideal, hopes, potential, and the youthful part of yourself. On the other hand, to see your son in your dream may not have any significance and is simply mirroring your waking life. The dream may also be a pun on "sun".

Television
To dream that you are watching television, represents your mind and its flowing thoughts. The dream reflects how you are receiving, integrating, and expressing your ideas and thoughts. The programs you dream of watching are an objective view of the things that are in your mind.

To dream that you are on TV, suggests that there is something that you want to broadcast to the whole world. You have the desire to express yourself. Alternatively, the dream means that you are trying to take a more objective view on your life issues.
Crying
To dream that you are crying, signifies a release of negative emotions that is more likely caused by some waking situation rather than the events of the dream itself. Your dream is a way to regain some emotional balance and to safely let out your fears and frustrations. In your daily lives, you tend to ignore, deny, or repress your feelings. But in your dream state, your defense mechanisms are no longer on guard and thus allow for the release of those feelings that you have repressed during the day.

Test
To dream that you are taking a test, indicates that you are being put to the test or being scrutinized in some way. If you fail the test, then it suggests that you are feeling inadequate or insecure about some aspect of your waking life. If you ace the test, then it means that you are prepared and ready for the task at hand. There is also the notion that if you visualize success, than you will achieve success in your real life. Thus, this dream may be a "practice exercise" for you to visualize success. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on "feeling testy" and irritated.

Office
To dream of your work office, indicates that you cannot seem to leave your work at the office. You are overworked or have too much on your mind. Alternatively, an office symbolizes practicality, status, accomplishments and your place in the world. If the office in your dream is unfamiliar or strange, then it suggests that you are comparing yourself to someone else. You are measuring yourself against other's standards.

Woman
To see a woman in your dream, represents nurturance, passivity, caring nature, and love. It refers to your own female aspects or your mother. Alternatively, a woman indicates temptation and guilt. If you know the woman, then it may reflect concerns and feelings you have about her

Stream
To see a stream in your dream, represents a flow of fresh and profound ideas. The stream is also symbolic of the flow of your emotions. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on something that is "streaming" in at a steady pace. Perhaps you need to be patient.

Hugging
To dream that you are hugging someone, symbolizes your loving and caring nature. You are holding someone or something close to your heart. Alternatively, it may indicate your need to be more affectionate.

Joy
To dream that you are joyful, denotes harmony amongst friends and loved ones. The dream is a reflection of your waking state of mind.


I feel this dream represents the tragedy surrounding Stella. As most things do in my life right now. The construction zone represents how i am trying to rebuild myself after this tragedy occurred in my life. The destruction of the site, where Matt worked, i feel represents his not wanting more children, which is something i want deeply. And in turn it has crushed and taken away hope i had towards that, signified as my "son". The sweater represents just how passionate i am on the idea of expanding our family. And how that was all that was left, was my wanting, the dream was washed away and lost. I feel the TV represents my blogging, and how i am very open publicly on this entire aspect of my life. The crying makes sense since i havent had a breakdown in a few days, i was releasing that negative energy or sadness in my unconscious state. The Test, Office and Woman i feel are all tied together and represent the other women in my life that i know that have been though a tragedy like i have. Maybe i unconsciously compare myself and how i am dealing with this to how everyone else is. I know i do actually. I judge myself on my healing, comparing how i am doing to how everyone else is enduring this same pain. The Stream, Hugging and Joy i believe are also tied together. If i can be patient and wait (for what it seems will be about 3 years) maybe Matt will change his prospective and we will have another child, who will bring me much joy and healing. One way to keep hope, right?

Its quite amazing how a dream can turn from one emotion i felt upon waking, based on the emotions the dream left me, to something completely different that makes total sense! This dream at first left me quite sad and now i have a sense of hope and have to be quite patient apparently (which i am not too good at by the way).

Thanks for reading!
Dream On!

~Krystal

Friday, April 8, 2011

Strange-ness that is my dreams-shit and piss

I have not interpreted my dreams in awhile due to some serious depression going on in me, but last nights dream just couldn't go with out some kind of interpretation! I have been having VERY vivid dreams lately and last nights woke me with the stinging fear and anxiety that held me captive for about an hour before i was able to drift back to sleep.

From where i remember it began in a school yard, the middle school from my childhood, it was dark and everything was in the form of shadows besides a group of animals that were preforming with fire. I was rolling around in a doughnut shaped pillow and dodging shadows that were spectators to the performance. I distinctly remember seeing a baby tiger.
Then i was interrupted by someone who must have been running the show and the pillow i was rolling around in  and laying on while watching the performance was property of the performers and they took it from me. I remember hearing the man say that is was like some freak hippy who couldn't keep herself form picking up the hula hoops at a string cheese concert. True i must say, lol. But then i was laying on the ground, which was more like a mound of dry dirt and watching the show, there was a group of children beside me who were preforming with balls of some kind all in unison. I remember looking at them and thinking that many of the girls looked familiar, maybe they were classmates of Briana? Then a little girl about 9-10 years of age gave me a weggie and i turned around and grabbed her arm and cussed her out saying " Touch my Fucking underwear again and ill break your damn arm" (yikes!) Then the girl asked me where my husband was and i felt like he was dead but he appeared next to me and he told me that he was in the bathroom with diarrhea. I was then in the schools bathroom with him. He said "it smells like shit in here" and i told him it was him that was making the smell. He tried blaming my cooking but i told him no one else in the family had the issue.

School
 A dream that takes place in school may be a metaphor for the lessons that you are learning from your waking life.
You may be going through a "spiritual learning" experience.
Night/Dark
To have a dream that takes place at night, represents some major setbacks and obstacles in achieving your goals. You are being faced with an issue that is not so clear cut. Perhaps, you should put the issues aside so you can clear your head and come back to it later. Alternatively, night may be synonymous with death, rebirth, reflection, and new beginnings.

Shadows
To see you own shadow in your dream, signifies an aspect of yourself which you have not acknowledged or recognized. It may be a quality about yourself or a part of you that you are rejecting or want to keep hidden. These qualities may not necessary be negative, but can be creative ones. Alternatively, the dream may mean that you are in someone else's shadow. You are constantly being overlooked and are fed up with it.

To see a shadowy figure in your dream, represents characteristics which you have not acknowledged or incorporated into your own personality. Alternatively, it symbolizes the young, the helpless or the under-developed.

I am sure all of these symbols connect with each other. I am certinly in a "spiritual journey" and feel quite in the dark with this situation and battle. The light was coming from the fire and performance.....

Animals
To see animals in your dream, represent your own physical characteristic, primitive desires, and sexual nature, depending on the qualities of the particular animal. Animals symbolize the untamed and uncivilized aspects of yourself. Refer to the specific animal in your dream.

Tiger
To see a tiger in your dream, represents power and your ability to exert it in various situations. The dream may also indicate that you need to take more of a leadership role. Alternatively, the tiger represents female sexuality, aggression, and seduction.

Fire
Depending on the context of your dream, to see fire in your dream can symbolize destruction, passion, desire, illumination, purification, transformation, enlightenment, or anger. It may suggest that something old is passing and something new is entering into your life. Your thoughts and views are changing. In particular, if the fire is under control or contained in one area, then it is a metaphor of your own internal fire and inner transformation. The dream may be a metaphor for someone who is "fiery". It represents your drive, motivation, and creative energy. Alternatively, the dream may be warning you of your dangerous or risky activities. You are literally "playing with fire".

Pillow
To see a pillow in your dream, represents comfort. relaxation, ease, and/or luxury. You need to take it easy on yourself. Alternatively, the dream indicates laziness.
To dream that you are lying on a pillow, suggests that you are in need of some mental support. Perhaps there is a situation or matter that you need to "cushion" and soften the blow.
To dream that your pillow is gone, indicates that you are in self-denial.
Ground
To dream that you are on the ground, represents your foundation and support system. It is also the boundary between your conscious and unconscious. You may be getting closer in confronting and acknowledging your unconscious thoughts. The dream may be a pun on being well-grounded and down to earth or that you have been grounded. Perhaps you are feeling restricted in some aspects of your life.
Children
To see children in your dream, signify an aspect of yourself and your childlike qualities. You may be retreating back to a childlike state and longing for the past. You are trying to still satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Perhaps there is something that you need to see grow and nurture. Take some time off and cater to the inner child within. Alternatively, the dream may be highlighting your innocence, purity, simplicity, and carefree attitude. If you are fighting with children, then it implies that you are repressing your inner child. The children could represent someone in your waking life (coworker, mate, sibling, etc.) who is acting like a child. If you see children fighting in your dream, then it means that your sense of morality and character are in conflict.
Ball
To see or play with a ball in your dream, symbolizes completeness and wholeness. It may also indicate that you need to be more in tune with the inner child within. The dream may also be a metaphor for the testicles. Consider also the phrase, "he's got balls" to indicate guts and strength.
To dream that you are watching a ball game, indicates that you need to take more initiative. Your lack of action may stem from your shyness which you must overcome. Perhaps you are too overly self-conscious.

Husband
To see your husband in your dream, signifies the waking relationship with your husband and the unconscious feelings you have towards him. The dream may be trying to focus on hidden elements that you are not addressing in your waking life.
Diarrhea
To dream that you have diarrhea, signifies that some part of your life is going out of control. You can no longer contain your strong emotions and need to get it out of your system quickly. Alternatively, the dream indicates that you have not analyzed a situation long enough or that you do not want to deal with the problem at all.
Bathroom
To dream that you are in the bathroom, relates to your instinctual urges. You may be experiencing some burdens/feelings and need to "relieve yourself". Alternatively, a bathroom symbolizes purification and self-renewal. You need to cleanse yourself, both emotionally and psychologically.
Stinks
To dream that something stinks, suggest that you are not being supported by your social circle or your environment. Alternatively, the dream refers to your suspicions.

I feel this dream is representing my waking relationship with my husband. Also the state of our grief seperatly and together.


Next up i drifted into a dream that i was arriving at my parents home, which was totally different than where they live now. My children went into the living room to watch TV when we arrived and my mother was making beef stew for dinner. He served my dad and went down stairs. Which i found as very odd and asked my father what was wrong with her. He told me that since me and my sisters went to London everything had changed and mom was extremely depressed. I told him that we never went to London and he looked at me kinda crazy and said "You will, right after you give me a piece of your brain that saves my life" As in this was all going to happen in the future or already did, i am not too sure, it was very weird. . I went down stairs and my mother was down there smoking. I noticed a baby in the corner whining and asked whose child it was. She told me she was watching a friends baby while she was working. I picked him up and noticed he looked VERY ILL. His limbs were turning purple and he was curling up into himself as i was trying to hold him. I told my mother that something was very wrong with the child and he needed to go to the hospital immediately. She told me that it was just because the mother had started him on cereal and it may have been a bad reaction. I told her it looked as though the baby had MS and that he NEEDED to go to the hospital and i screamed at her " I will NOT be responsible for the death of someone else's baby!!" She looked at me and sunk into her chair and said "I don't know why i have become so lazy" I brought the child upstairs and he started pooping, it came bursting out of each corner of his diaper and all over the floor, i held him away from me and the diaper fell off and BM and urine was EVERYWHERE! I simple stated that i hated disposable diapers. I looked over and noticed Gerber cereal and carrots in the child's diaper bag. My mother was getting rags to help clean up the mess and i stated that the child needed a bath before we went to the hospital. I was spitting like i had got some crap in my mouth and the last thing i remember seeing was my father, still alone at the table, eating his beef stew. I woke up with the pang of anxiety running through my chest that i couldn't shake for quite awhile. I wonder WTH this dream can mean!?!?
Lets take a look at what the Dream interpretation site calls for.......
Parents
To see your parents in your dream, symbolize both power, shelter, and love. You may be expressing your concerns and worries about your own parents. Alternatively, it represents the merging of the female and male aspects of your character.

Mother
To see your mother in your dream, represents the nurturing aspect of your own character. Mothers offer shelter, comfort, life, guidance and protection. Some people may have problems freeing themselves from their mothers and are thus seeking their own individuality and development.

To dream that you are having a conversation with your mother, denotes a matter that has preoccupied your mind and you are not sure how to deal with it in your waking life. It indicates unresolved problems that need to be worked out with your mother.Father
To see your father in your dream, symbolizes authority and protection. It suggests that you need to be more self-reliant. Consider also your waking relationship with your father and how aspects of his character may be incorporated within yourself.

Dinner
To dream that you are eating dinner alone, indicates that you need to do some serious thinking about your goals and directions in life. Alternatively, it may represent independence or lack of social skills.

Stairs
To dream that you are walking down a flight of stairs, represents your repressed thoughts. You are regressing back into your unconscious. It also refers to the setbacks that you are experiencing in your life. If you are afraid of going down the stairs, then it means that you are afraid to confront your repressed emotions and thoughts. Is there something from your past that you are not acknowledging?
Smoking
If you do not smoke in waking life and dream that you are smoking, then it indicates that you are trying to shield yourself and others against your emotions. You have trouble letting others in.

The dream may also be a metaphor for an addictive relationship or habit in your waking life.
To see someone smoking in your dream, depends on your on personal associations with smoking. However, it often indicates some sort of dissension, disagreement or rebellion.

Baby
To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. If you find a baby in your dream, then it suggests that you have acknowledged your hidden potential. If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses. Alternatively, forgetting about a baby, represents an aspect of yourself that you have abandoned or put aside due to life's changing circumstances. The dream may serve as a reminder that it is time for you to pick up that old interest, hobby, or project again. If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it signifies your issues of dependency and your desires to be completely care for. Perhaps you are trying to get out of some responsibility. If you are pregnant in real life, then a more direct interpretation may simply mean that you are experiencing some anxieties of making it to the hospital when the time comes.

To dream of a crying baby, symbolizes a part of yourself that is deprived of attention and needs to be nurtured. Alternatively, it represents your unfulfilled goals and a sense of lacking in your life. If you dream that a baby is neglected, then it suggests that you are not paying enough attention to yourself. You are not utilizing your full potential. Alternatively, this dream could represent your fears about your own children and your ability to protect and to provide for them.
Baby Food
To see or feed baby food in your dream, indicates that nurturance and care is needed in a waking situation. Alternatively, the dream may be a metaphor to indicate that you need to eat smaller portions of food.

Feces
To see or come in contact with feces, signifies aspects of yourself that are dirty and negative and which you believe to be undesirable and repulsive. You need to acknowledge and express these feelings, even though it may be shameful. Release the negativity in your life. Alternatively, it may also refer to someone who is anal retentive.

To dream that you are unable to dispose of the feces, suggests that you are unwilling to let go of your emotions. You have a tendency to hold in and keep your feelings to yourself.
According to Freud, feces is related to possession, pride, shame, money/financial matters, or aggressive acts. So to dream that you are playing with feces, symbolizes your anxiety over money matters and financial security.
Urination
To see urine in your dream, represents the feelings you have rejected. Alternatively, the dream may be a pun on your "pissy" attitude.

To dream that you are urinating, symbolizes a cleansing and a release of negative or repressed emotions. Depending on your dream context, urination is symbolic of having or lacking basic control of your life. You are literally "pissed off" and not expressing yourself in a positive or constructive manner.
To dream that someone is urinating on you, means that you are feeling the emotional burden of this person. They are dumping all their feelings on you. Alternatively, the dream symbolizes your lacking sense of self-worth.
Spit
To spit in your dream, signifies an aspect of yourself that you need to get rid of. Spitting represents anger, spite and contempt. Alternatively, the dream implies that you have something that you want to say. Spit it out!
Mess
To see a mess in your dream, symbolizes the state of your waking life. You need to get your life in order.

Hospital
To see or dream that you are in a hospital, symbolizes your need to heal or improve your physical or mental health. You need to get back to the flow of everyday life. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are giving up control of your own body. Perhaps you are afraid of losing control of your body.


I can see what this dream is stating pretty clearly now that ihave it all out in front of me. The loss of my baby made my life and mind a mess and the hospital represents my need for help to get this all out. My father is a representation of myself and eating alone represents my lack in social skills since this "mess" My mother was also a representation of myself and her smoking and being lazy represents my depression and how i want to shield my emotions. The feces and urine represent how i feel ashamed of my current emotional state and what happened to my baby. I feel like a failure and responsible for her death.